I am back after a few months of silence. Well, the months have not been silent in themselves though... I have heard words which were almost never spoken, I have heard sounds which no one made efforts to create, I have sensed feelings which I perhaps never knew existed in such extreme contours.
They have been like sand in one's palm. Now that I think about it, an amazing creation of nature it is, sand is, at once a singular mass with commanding weight of its own, and at another moment split into plural fragments that vanish slowly yet steadily, much like moments from time's clenched fists. Akin it is to my feelings in last few weeks... sometimes sitting so heavy in my heart that it is difficult to breathe, and in another instant sliding away like a drop of dew from a petal... as if the petal was not its home through the beautiful night.
Looking back, it just seems too rich an experience to fret about, too intimate a feeling to wish away. Yet, I struggle with the meaning of it, I wish I could make a sense of it as I have on numerous other occasions, I yearn so tumultous a period could leave me with learnings I could immediately see. I don't hold much in my hands, not at the moment at least. And yet I feel all the grains of sand have not slipped off my palm just as yet... that I am richer having seen such an edginess of nature, that I have a greater repertoire of emotions, though I may never have consciously bargained for it.
I am glad I wrote as much and I am glad to be back to face myself. Let's take the story forward...
Sunday, October 14, 2007
A boy who learnt swimming one summer..
My last flight from London to Singapore was spent reading a book written by an author I had never thought I would ever read. It was "Screw it, lets do it" by Richard Branson. I must confess I always thought this maverick CEO of Virgin Atlantic was a just another rich kid with a freedom to experiment with rich hobbies such as owning and selling Virgin Music, a hobby few of us can afford to have, and a hobby that won't necessarily make me any fond of the person.
But the reality, as I found from the pages that rushed past, was Richard Branson was born to a normal middle class family. What he inherited from his parents, especially his mom, was a strong sense of determination to win. Kid Branson, then 8 or 10 years old, went to his aunt's place one summer and his aunt offered him a rather interesting challenge - if Richard could learn swmming before going back home, he would earn 20 pounds sterling from his aunt. Richard tried and on the day the Bransons were ready to head back home, he still hadn't learnt how to float on his own. He was disheartened and sad.
But he still hadn't lost the hope to win, the burning desire to prove he could win, to tell his aunt he never gave up. On the way back in the car the kid saw a small pond and shouted to stop the car. The family stepped out of the car in amazement as the kid ran and threw himself in water. And behold, he was beginning to float on his own in the pond! They were still not home and hence the kid had won the bet. His aunt was happy to pass on the GBP 20 note to the young Branson.
Well, this story doesn't end here. Once while setting up his business Richard needed some cash and his dad didn't have that kind of money. He sent him to see his aunt though, and Richard's aunt lent him the required amount of money that ultimately led to the setting up of Virgin Music. Little did Richard know that his old aunt had put a mortgage on her home to arrange for the cash. Such was her faith in the determination of this young man.
Earning trust is tough, but earning this kind of faith from someone in your ability to win is remarkable. This guy somewhere inspires me in interesting ways.
I was playing badminton yesterday and losing a match 2-12. We had a formidable competition and I knew I couldn't win. But this story struck me and I decided to fight on. We lost 8-14, but I was glad we gave it a shot, we pulled ourselves together and said we won't go down without putting up a stiff challenge. More tomorrow, catch up!
But the reality, as I found from the pages that rushed past, was Richard Branson was born to a normal middle class family. What he inherited from his parents, especially his mom, was a strong sense of determination to win. Kid Branson, then 8 or 10 years old, went to his aunt's place one summer and his aunt offered him a rather interesting challenge - if Richard could learn swmming before going back home, he would earn 20 pounds sterling from his aunt. Richard tried and on the day the Bransons were ready to head back home, he still hadn't learnt how to float on his own. He was disheartened and sad.
But he still hadn't lost the hope to win, the burning desire to prove he could win, to tell his aunt he never gave up. On the way back in the car the kid saw a small pond and shouted to stop the car. The family stepped out of the car in amazement as the kid ran and threw himself in water. And behold, he was beginning to float on his own in the pond! They were still not home and hence the kid had won the bet. His aunt was happy to pass on the GBP 20 note to the young Branson.
Well, this story doesn't end here. Once while setting up his business Richard needed some cash and his dad didn't have that kind of money. He sent him to see his aunt though, and Richard's aunt lent him the required amount of money that ultimately led to the setting up of Virgin Music. Little did Richard know that his old aunt had put a mortgage on her home to arrange for the cash. Such was her faith in the determination of this young man.
Earning trust is tough, but earning this kind of faith from someone in your ability to win is remarkable. This guy somewhere inspires me in interesting ways.
I was playing badminton yesterday and losing a match 2-12. We had a formidable competition and I knew I couldn't win. But this story struck me and I decided to fight on. We lost 8-14, but I was glad we gave it a shot, we pulled ourselves together and said we won't go down without putting up a stiff challenge. More tomorrow, catch up!
Ignite a match stick before it can glow...
Don't you sometimes feel the urge to grab the spotlight? To be 'the one'? To be the disseminator of gyan (knowledge)?
Well, I do. Looking back, I realize I do have strong pangs of this urge.
And as it appears, I am not alone in thinking that way, in craving to be someone I am not, or am not as yet. Being famous is one of the top fantasies of mankind. It is an insight that inspired the marketers of Filmfare magazine to create that memorable ad campaign where a common man or woman in a moment of solitude suddenly picks up energy and acts as if the person is receiving the famous Filmfare award under spotlights.
While I couldn't bring myself to do that, thinking it to be a bit too superficial, I have hogged my own bit of imaginary importance. I have picked up spiritual nuggets from here and there, and theorized in less profound ways to make myself believe I know something about what mankind is all about, what the spirit soul and the super soul are all about. What, as Dr Kiran Seth - founder of Spic Macay says, 'paraa' and 'aparaa' vidya (material and spiritual knowledge) is all about. And I always thought it was beautiful, it was a well woven fabric.
But somewhere I couldn't conceal from myself a feeling of lack of depth, an inability to see and experience truth as it is. Lack of an internal glow that makes you feel satisfied from within.
And then I read Swami Vivekananda last week and realized, you can't make a match-stick glow unless you have enough substance that makes it ready, and until you have made it hit the rugged patch and created a spark. Once it has begun to glow, it would attract attention even in a dark, large forest. It would have enough flies flocking around it to share the warmth. Sri Ram Krishna Paramhans imparted this knowledge to him and Swami Vivekananda says in his book ‘My Master’, “I often tend to lose sight of this advice, how important it is to make one seek, acquire, and test the truth for oneself before beginning to disseminate the information to others”.
The challenge for all of us is to find that one idea, that original thought that would define our being in this world. As Vivekananda says, “even if a man locks himself up in a cave, comes up with a brilliant thought and dies, that thought would never die there. It would break through the stone walls of the cave and spread out. It would move on its own till it has reached the humanity and disseminated itself among men and women of substance”.
A thought never thought of, an idea never dreamt of, an original probe for the one within us. How often do we stop in our tracks to even wonder about it? Those who merely see that Asia stayed backward for hundreds of years while the West progressed, overlook the fact that the Orient had the courage and the determination to pursue an original thought that connected it to the one within. A determination that defied the basic instinct to hoard, to amass wealth, and to enjoy life as is apparent to human senses.
That courage to give up everything in the search of eternal truth was what defined human existence for the Orient. Little else, in many ways, mattered.
I am not sure about the ability to find the truth within, but this thought alone gives me the courage to hold on to my steps, to drill deeper, to find something before I progress to the next step... before I run on with life as I have been living it for the last 20-30 years. Is there anything else to be shared otherwise?
Let the world pass by, let the steps running past me sound distant… this is my life and possibly the only lifetime I know I have. Let me spend more time on the steps, the goals may be more inside me than in the world beyond. I need to ignite the spark that would make me glow from within… a glow that seldom arises, but ones awaken, that never dies.
Well, I do. Looking back, I realize I do have strong pangs of this urge.
And as it appears, I am not alone in thinking that way, in craving to be someone I am not, or am not as yet. Being famous is one of the top fantasies of mankind. It is an insight that inspired the marketers of Filmfare magazine to create that memorable ad campaign where a common man or woman in a moment of solitude suddenly picks up energy and acts as if the person is receiving the famous Filmfare award under spotlights.
While I couldn't bring myself to do that, thinking it to be a bit too superficial, I have hogged my own bit of imaginary importance. I have picked up spiritual nuggets from here and there, and theorized in less profound ways to make myself believe I know something about what mankind is all about, what the spirit soul and the super soul are all about. What, as Dr Kiran Seth - founder of Spic Macay says, 'paraa' and 'aparaa' vidya (material and spiritual knowledge) is all about. And I always thought it was beautiful, it was a well woven fabric.
But somewhere I couldn't conceal from myself a feeling of lack of depth, an inability to see and experience truth as it is. Lack of an internal glow that makes you feel satisfied from within.
And then I read Swami Vivekananda last week and realized, you can't make a match-stick glow unless you have enough substance that makes it ready, and until you have made it hit the rugged patch and created a spark. Once it has begun to glow, it would attract attention even in a dark, large forest. It would have enough flies flocking around it to share the warmth. Sri Ram Krishna Paramhans imparted this knowledge to him and Swami Vivekananda says in his book ‘My Master’, “I often tend to lose sight of this advice, how important it is to make one seek, acquire, and test the truth for oneself before beginning to disseminate the information to others”.
The challenge for all of us is to find that one idea, that original thought that would define our being in this world. As Vivekananda says, “even if a man locks himself up in a cave, comes up with a brilliant thought and dies, that thought would never die there. It would break through the stone walls of the cave and spread out. It would move on its own till it has reached the humanity and disseminated itself among men and women of substance”.
A thought never thought of, an idea never dreamt of, an original probe for the one within us. How often do we stop in our tracks to even wonder about it? Those who merely see that Asia stayed backward for hundreds of years while the West progressed, overlook the fact that the Orient had the courage and the determination to pursue an original thought that connected it to the one within. A determination that defied the basic instinct to hoard, to amass wealth, and to enjoy life as is apparent to human senses.
That courage to give up everything in the search of eternal truth was what defined human existence for the Orient. Little else, in many ways, mattered.
I am not sure about the ability to find the truth within, but this thought alone gives me the courage to hold on to my steps, to drill deeper, to find something before I progress to the next step... before I run on with life as I have been living it for the last 20-30 years. Is there anything else to be shared otherwise?
Let the world pass by, let the steps running past me sound distant… this is my life and possibly the only lifetime I know I have. Let me spend more time on the steps, the goals may be more inside me than in the world beyond. I need to ignite the spark that would make me glow from within… a glow that seldom arises, but ones awaken, that never dies.
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